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alenq @ deviantART


Sometimes, I can't help feeling very vengeful and evil. When you see evil things being done to those who didn't deserve it, I just can't take it... I have an urge to do all the deadliest stuffs to them. But life isn't fair to begin with.

I once believed in Justice, and that those guys who did bad things should be punished duly by the law. But over the years, I realise this was not what I really believed in. I just can't take it lying down. Today, I believe that a Life Sentence is actually a far worse punishment than a Death Sentence. Because living life is a torture itself.

If someone who actually is a mass murderer, I will not give him a death sentence. I will tie him up with chain. And torture him everyday. Because a death alone, cannot pay for the many deaths he have caused. He deserves to suffer the hurt equivalent to the hurt he have caused. Which will eventually earn him an eternal torture.

How much can one's Vengeance go?

I know in future, I might not take many things lying down just like that. Because of my own personality.

I wonder, will I really get what I want? Even if after I may have done the deadliest stuffs to my targets already, would I be satisfied? Or would my own guilt haunt me forever? But I doubt my guilt will haunt me. For the person I deal with, definitely will be one who won't feel guilt.

This then becomes a chain reaction. It goes on and on... I wish I can get out of this mindset. But sometimes, some people are just too incorrigible that I just can't stand it...


On the other hand, I feel so... helpless at times. Suddenly, I don't feel confident about my 3D game. Not even my 2D game. And more importantly, I'm afraid of what the future lies ahead for me. I'm too afraid to face it...


zj you useless bastard
can't you even take
a little bit
of pain
of setbacks
of disappointment?
you are so weak
you disgust me

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